Bring it on!

I remember back in the day - after my military service done in 2011 - when I was so passionate about studying English, I was obsessed with everything about English. I was blinded, for all intents and purposes, but not by physical attacks from strangers. I was blinded by the sheer glory of the new linguistic flow that was flooded right into deep inside my brain. To gratify my insatiable desire for English, I think I did everything I was able to obtain: listening to Podcast all day long even during a short break at work, watching a massive number of movies and dramas, communicating with penpals that I met on InterPals, and so on. But I could not get enough of any of them.

What the heck had happened to me back then? Where did the interest in English come from? And why have I been sticking at this level in the way I don’t think I have ever reached fluency?

For the first and second questions, I am clearly aware of the answer and can say it in confidence, humiliation. When I first started off to Europe by myself, I wanted to enjoy the last month of having complete freedom before enlisting in the army. But what was awaiting there was quite far from what I expected. Since I barely spoke English and sort of refused other people’s welcome because of the lack of my English, I could not fully enjoy the trip and was frustrated in myself. It made me think that maybe I should come back here again, with better commands of English. After my military service done, I landed a job to make money for traveling and English-studying. And then I began searching for valuable information on English studying tips and followed what I thought would be applicable and useful to me. Aside from sleep and work, I studied English 8 hours a day like a psychic, like speaking to myself in public and focusing too much on podcasts that I was almost hit by a car. With accumulated knowledge and countless practice on my English skills, I had a lot of fun on my second trip to Europe. 

As for the last question, still not near to the level that I can be satisfied with, I think I lost or am still losing what I used to have in my mind which made me feel alive. After the successful Euro trip and throughout years of tiresome school life, I got distracted and all my passion of English shifted into somewhere else. Although I was at a fairly luck situation where I had an American girlfriend and some English speaking friends, it rarely helped improve my English. The problem with having an English-speaking girlfriend is that I am not saying I approached to her to take advantage of her but I became so lazy with self-study on English. This case can be the proof of the fact that merely going to a country where a target language is spoken cannot be an answer to its improvement. 

For the time being, I have a lot of free time by August and am not under a lot of stress anymore. “7 months”, the length of this period could be seen where long or short depending on my viewpoint. I want to get back what I am missing now. Until the beginning of master’s course in the US in August, I want to improve my pronunciation and intonation, speaking and writing skills. And I yearn for deeper conversation with my new English-speaking girlfriend on any topics of interest. I know when “want” takes over “needs” on a certain task, the person can change completely and leap onto a far higher level. Keep your fingers crossed!